The hardest thing to date in my life.
We just put our most beautiful cat to sleep.
In a way that is a good term, as she looked like she was sleeping after. She is so perfect.
A lot of crying and a lot of emotion. Even though you know you have to, and it is the right thing and the right time – you always want a little more. Some more head pushing, purring, under the covers, face to face, in the pudge.
I really love that cat. More then I do most people. She loved us – more then most people. An emptieness sits in me now.
I don’t know where it will go or what it will do. This is a new journey for me. Lost.
But she is more peaceful and without pain. That was the strong gift we had to give.
Our responsibility. Our Task. Our lives. Our Time. Now.
Listen to this and be warned – the first bars are misleading. It starts off like a twangy piece of country – then you hear that voice and something lifts in your soul. The soft guitar fuzz creeps in and you start to realize you are hearing something special. Then the chorus breaks over you like an avalanche and you don’t know where it came from or which way is up. Sizzling cold fury breaks along your breadth and you don’t know how to think anymore!
Among Others by Jo Walton, is a book long on promise, but short on delivery. Shortlisted for the Hugo and receiving high praise, perhaps left me with expectations too high.
The basic premise is excellent. 70′s schoolgirl who has family issues, highlighted by a crappy mother (who doesn’t) AND talks to fairies. We’re left waiting fo the magic and the story arc to mix in a fairly violent way.
OH how we wish we had magic to help solve our daily issues, yet for Jo Walton the moral implications of use can be tricky. This is the strong point of the book, as far as the fantasy aspect. There is a great ‘system’ of magic in use. A combination of druidism and fairy magic that is simple, effective and, most importantly, believable.
The book is really a coming of age story of a teen-age girl, yes she can do magic and yes she can speak to fairies, but that is much background and has little to do with what plot there is. While Mor is shipped off to boarding school, there is no Harry Potter moments here. She is just a kid shipped off to boarding school, reflecting vague attempts to fend off her mother’s attacks. Here as in many other places in the novel, we are given a hazy idea of what is happening, but without any great detail or description.
The best part of the book is in the late trend of homaging a genre – like in the films Hugo or The Artist. Jo Walton here gives us a who’s who of Sci-Fi, Fantasy via Mor’s speed reading capabilities. For me these were the high points, as I was able to wax nostalgic over my reading history. While I may use this as reference for the future, it did not capture me in the story.
Perusing the Amazon reviews, I found what I expected to find, a majority of reviews from woman. This is a coming of age story about a girl, and I think it would have resonated a bit more with me had I been born female. As it was, I was happy to see a bit into the mind of a teenage girl – might help me in my relations!
This was a movie that I tried unsuccessfully to shrug off. A sci-fi themed movie about Depression.
Depression scares me. I just ask myself – how can people be like that? And I know that sometimes I am like that. Luckily not the debilitating degree of the Kirsten Dunst character Julia, but to some extent this is a demon that mos of of face on, perhaps, a too regular basis.
What do you do when you are feeling down? What about those closest to you? How do you deal with these things? At times I understood and at others I felt like the Kiefer Sutherland character, John. the husband who married into a family of loonies. He obviously doesn’t “get it” but you can easily sympathize with him. This is something I find myself not wanting to “get”. It’s similar to death, and in this movie it was much easier for me to contemplate my feelings on the destruction of the world then on that of a person close to me, or myself, suffering from depression. It is what they say, the average person has a greater fear of public speaking (something that in my adult life doesn’t faze me) then they do of death.
Now I wonder if depression is something you have without even knowing? Chatting to those close to me, they tell me I humph and haw and act listless. Is depression something that one can have without even knowing? Could it be a problem in my life effecting others the way that I am afraid of being effected? Arghhgg – I don’t think of myself that way, but that no longer means that it is not true.
If I was to learn something from this film it is that depression is a reality, like death, that at somepoint I will have to confront. I guess this is why there are shrinks (and xanex) to help you with these kind of qustions!
As for the construction of Melancholia, I thought it was excellent. The opening was a wonderful decent into dreamy imagery. I would have swapped my personal soundtrack including Pink Floyd’s Set The Controls For The Heart Of The Sun and Black Sabbaths’ Hand Of Doom. The imagery was languid and enthralling. The feelings were impressed into your cells, a few hours later I am still fealing a weight on my chest.
Justine basking in her Melancholia
There is another aspect to Justine, in her attitudes toward’s her sister Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg). It is selfishness. Her sister shows almost nothing but patience and love, though she does express exasperation on occasion. Then when the end draws near, and Claire has a simple request of ending it with a glass of wine and a song, Justine calls her plan out as ‘complete shit’. After all the patience shown by those around her, for her character to display no empathy or care for those who dote on her, in a way brings me back to my prior point – that perhaps it is difficult to know that you are suffering from depression? If she was unaware of her actions, that might allow the subsequent thrashing of those others. The other option is that she is just a selfish bitch? It could be a fundamental character flaw of character of a symptom of the disease? I have the disturbing feeling that I am both selfish and condescending and that I am more on both sides of this relationship then I may realize.